How to master tantric sex: 10 tips for the beginners

Dating tips
February 14, 2020

In the world where quickies become popular, it is time to remember that stunning long sex sessions and try the entire tantric sex techniques.

What is tantric sex

The legend says that Tantra was discovered in India around 300 and 400 CE, to the times when the first Hindu and Buddhist Tantric texts were created, which promised to lead to the Divine Love. Barely anyone could understand it at first, besides its creators, of course. Before that time, Tantric teachings were used after long preparations and purifications.

The first form of it is Tantra. Tantra means to weave or simple “to weave energy.” You can go through it with a partner or by yourself. Think of tantric sex more like the deeper enlightenment between two spirits to get even more private and intimate on all possible levels.

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Touching each other bodies is important during tantric sex

Set your mind for meditation to evolve tantric sex practices

For better or for worse, tantric sex is not something that you can have with your partner once you just finished dinner. Tantric sex defined as more spiritual and slow intimacy process. This is the reason, tantric is not something you can do one evening. It will take preparation and time.

Meditate to set your mind

Setting your mind to one of the most important things for tantric sex. That will help you to relax, open your mind, and body.

If you haven’t meditated before, it could seem a little bit more complex. We would suggest trying to meditate in advance, just for 5-10 minutes every day. Take a week or week and a half to start before actually having tantric sex. That would help your mind to get used to it. Then 30 minutes before the tantric practice won’t seem like forever.

Important note is that meditation is required for both of you, your partner and yourself

Get into the Lotus position

The lotus position is one of the most common for meditation. This way, your back is straight, your legs are crossed, and it is easy to breathe normally while your hands are resting on the side of your knees. If you never meditated before — start with 5 minutes and then add a minute or two every single time. Stretching also helps to relax. You can try it before or after your meditation session just for a couple of minutes.


Breathing is the key to meditation and tantric sex. That will keep you relaxed and focused on your sexual body flow. The best way to breathe is to inhale the air with your nose, filling up your belly with the air, and exhale after. You can start breathing like this during meditation, so it will become more automatic for you during sex.

In case you are having troubles to relax, and breathing doesn’t help, below you can find a few breathing exercises for you and your partner.

Use the 4-7-8 technique

  • This technique will help to relax and get rid of tension.
  • Take a deep breath with your mouth and then close it.
  • Right after taking a breath through your nose while counting till 4.
  • Hold your breath counting till 7.
  • Take a deep breath with your mouth while counting till 8.
  • Repeat the exercise 4 times.

Count breaths

  • It helps to clear your mind and set the connection between mentality and body.
  • Close your eyes and take 3 deep breaths.
  • Now breathe normally for a bit.
  • On count “one” take a deep breath and breathe out.
  • Next one count till two and so on till five.
  • Repeat the cycle for 10 minutes.

Use a stimulation breathing technique

  • This will “turn on” your energy flow and awareness.
  • Close your eyes and relax your stomach muscles.
  • For 15 seconds, breathe fast with your nose. Try to make 3 inhales and exhales in a second.
  • After 15 seconds of breathing normally.
  • Now breathe quickly again but for 20 seconds now.
  • Evolve the cycle each time for 5 seconds till you go all the way up to 1 minute.
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Tantric sex techniques to reach the peak

Before you start

There are a few steps to make before you get naked and put the oil on each other.


Tantric experts suggest to celibate before you try tantra. If you have regular sexual life with your partner, a week or two of celibacy will play a great deal for both of you. That way, you will build up tension and hold all the sexual energy inside that will be released during tantra.

Eat lightly

Since the tantra itself is a long session, we would suggest eating light food that won’t bring you discomfort during your practice. It is important to stay in complete peace with your soul and body.

Stretch your body

Meditation before and tantra itself will need your body to be flexible enough. So while you are on celibacy try to have 5-10 minutes of stretching every morning. It will help your body to relax more.

Prepare the place for the scene

Think outside of the box. You can place the session in the bedroom but instead of the bed, set everything on the floor. Throw pillows and blankets around, arrange oils near so you can reach them without standing up. The opposite works for candles, keep them as far as possible in case you are going to get too hot.


During the tantric sex

Once you are all set to get started with tantra session, here are the tips that shall help you to feel more during tantric sex with your partner.

Get to know your body

If you are curious about tantric sex techniques without a partner, it is fine. Sex nor penetration is the final destination for tantric sex meditation. Same as yoga, a tantric technique also will guide you to total body awareness.

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Explore bodies and look at the body language

Explore your partner’s body

If your partner is new to the tantra sex thing, it is important to talk to him. Guide him through your fantasies and thoughts. It is also necessary to have a dialog where he also explains what he wants to try with tantra sex.

Do not overwhelm him with information. It’s only about your pleasure but your peak. If you both don’t know where to start — seek a teacher who can guide you through.

Massage each other

You can massage each other or yourself. Pick out your favorite oil and cover the body. Keep in mind that it is not a one-way move. Set the timer, for instance, let each other massage for 2-3 minutes and then switch.

When any of you are getting a massage session, try to guide a person saying directions for areas to massage or its speed and toughness. That will help further on when it will be sexual interaction.

Make eye contact

Eye contact is important through the entire tantric practice. This helps to connect with a partner, will make sex feel more close and intimate. Some tantric specialists suggest looking into the left eye. We say don’t overthink it and do whatever it feels right.

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Keep your focus on one action at the time


Technically, tantric sex considers everything sensual as foreplay. Touching, massaging, etc. Since we went through those steps already, we will focus on more social foreplay standards.

After you massage each other, keep eye contact and get closer to each other. Start to kiss one another. Here is what is important. Instead of being all over each other once you start kissing, try to slow things down. While you are kissing, put all your energy into that. Try to feel it with every inch of your body. After you can move to oral sex and fingering or whatever is on your plan. Remember not to rush — tantric sex is all about building up the sexual energy.

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Your body will lead you the way you only need to listen

Communicate through body

Feel through your body and your brain. Try to explore the entire body of your partner to see how their body would react if you touch it here or there. You need to focus your inner energy and intuition to understand your partner without words.

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Yab yum tantric sex position

Experiment with yab yum

Yab yum is a traditional sex position for tantric sex. This pose is the best to connect with your partner and to be as deep and as close to each other as possible.

To accomplish this position, you need to ask your partner to sit on the floor and cross his legs. Sit on top of him and cross your legs behind his back. To get more comfortable, place a pillow under you.

Yab yum position can lead you to the highest peaks. But let’s not forget that this is a suggested position and you both can decide which positions to try.

Delay your orgasm

We consider this part the most tempting. You need to think this through and do not come too fast. The longer you wait, the stronger the orgasm will be. The feeling would be like you are hanging on the edge every single time.

Practice it by yourself. Try to get to the peak where you are too close to coming then stop and start all over again. Then when you try it next time with your partner, you will know how to manage it and release the most in the end.

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Benefits of tantric sex

Benefits of tantric sex practice

Tantric sex helps to know your partner’s and your own body better. Tantric professionals believe that with the right mindset and effort, you can reach the same peak as you would after using ecstasy.

Tantric sex technique is for you if you are looking for a more meaningful spiritual connection with your partner, you are in for experimenting in bed, or you look for a pleasant relaxation together.

Besides, obvious reasons to try tantric sex, there are also a bunch of benefits that you might never think about.

Getting to know what you want in bed

Tantric is a sex meditation where your partner takes full action on pleasing your body. Not only by eventual penetration but sensual touching. We have no idea how many erogenous zones our bodies have until we experiment. Tantric sex guides you into that.

While you are being relaxed, your body will reveal the most unexpected pleasure zones that you had no idea before.

Breaking down mental walls

Even Rihanna and Beyonce have bad days when they are not completely satisfied with their bodies. Tantric sex definition is all about breaking down mental unconfidence and sexual blocks. For instance, tantric sex can help you to get in that body confidence you have been missing for a little while. Or you might think you are not bendy enough. Even simple preparation for tantra will help you to feel more stretched.

Healing sexual traumas

The intimacy that you would experience during tantric sex will help you to let go of some traumas that could have happened to you before. Sexual assault experience can go to the point where you do not feel it anymore. Tantric sex is very slow and respectful towards your body and mentality that should help overcome previous fears.

Discovering your sexual energy

Our daily life is stressful. Even when we think that we are fully relaxed, we are still in a lot of tension. Tantric sex helps you to relax physically and mentally. Once you are in that state, you will feel another level of the sexual flow within your body.

Experiencing multiple orgasms

A lot of women feel much stronger orgasms while trying tantric sex techniques. Tantric sex is also one of the most effective ways to squirt. That happens because the main point of tantric sex is a journey itself and not the final orgasmic destination. This way your body builds your sexual energy that could be released in more than just one way.

Complete connection with your partner

If we needed to define tantric sex in one word, we would choose connection. This is where two beautiful bodies and souls connect in one amazing act of love, peace, and relaxation. You both are in the same state of mind, both here to make this experience unforgettable and trying to make the most out of it.

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The bottom line. Tantric sex checklist

Tantric sex is rewarding. If you are into more slow and intimate games – tantric sex is what you have been missing out. That practice will be great to connect with a partner on an entirely new level and explore your body.

Now you are all set to go out to the magic road of tantric sex and fully enjoy the journey. Here are the main points to keep in mind.

  • Prepare the ideal space for further intimacy. Make sure the place is romantic enough and don’t forget to have enough time, tantric sex is a quickie.
  • Set your mind. Meditate to open your mind and receive more than you could ever expect.
  • Try breathing exercises while meditating. Breathing helps to set your mind and body in the right mood.
  • Explore your own body and the body of your partner. Connect through eye contact, body language, and massages or touches. The more you know – the more you can feel.
  • Foreplay is as important as everything else. Try to focus on one thing at the time though. If it is kissing – be involved only in kissing and get the most. If it is oral sex – do the same and slow things down.
  • Yab yum position is one of the best intimate positions for tantric sex and in general. Yet you can try any position you want, whatever makes you feel good.
  • Don’t rush to the orgasm but enjoy the journey to get to the peak. Every time you feel close to it – stop. Just for a minute and after – keep going.


What is tantric sex?

Tantra means “to weave energy”. You can practice it on your own or with a partner.

What is the best sex position for tantric sex?

The most common and effective sex position is yab yum position. It is when your partner sits on the floor or bed with his legs crossed and you sit on top of him and put your legs together behind his back.

Is it necessary to meditate before tantric sex?

It is not the rules but it is recommended to set your mind and breathing to the right place and speed.

What is Tantric Touch?

Tantric Touch is basically an ultimate exchange of energy and total awareness of your body and all the sensual touches it will receive. It is also known as a touch of love.

How do you do Tantric breathing?

Tantric breathing is mostly calm and focuses on your relaxation. You can achieve it with meditation and breathing exercises.

How do you start Tantric?

There are quite a few steps to get started with tantric sex. You need to prepare your body and mentality first. After you need to pick the right timing without distractions and set the place. In the process, you would need to be one complete spirit with your partner and trust each other.

Does Tantra really work?

Tantra is one of the most awakening sexual and mental practices. You might not get to the highest point right away, but once you follow the main steps and experiment (because all bodies and mentalities are different) you will experience it fully.

What is the goal of Tantra?

The main goal is to get to know your body and mentality, to reach higher peaks within any kind of pleasure. Tantra connects the body and your brain together and connects it with your partner.

What are Tantric mantras?

There are multiple Tantric mantras that are used in puja, which means worship, and to help resolve any possible issues. There is a wide range of Tantric mantras, each designed to resolve a particular issue. Tantra is a term used to describe the esoteric mystical and ritualistic religious traditions.

Tantric sex positions

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