The popularity of rough sex has gone up lately. As much as girls and guys love being tender in bed, there’s something different about openly being bad. It’s hardcore, sexy, and liberating. Kinky sex isn’t just about pleasure — it’s also a way to explore the sides of personality you never knew you have.
Having hard sex, however, requires preparation. You need to settle your mind and body for tough love. Otherwise, the consequences can even be dangerous. So, I prepared a full rough sex guide for you with precautions and rough hardcore sex ideas for women. Let’s dive right in.
What is hard sex
Rough sex is the kind of sex where pleasure is delivered through the pain. It usually features BDSM, violent foreplay, and dominant or submissive roles. Partners need to know what role fits them better and get along with what the other person is doing.
There is also a lot of misconceptions about hardcore sex ideas. It’s normal to enjoy painful activities, especially if you’ve been doing the same old thing with your partner for a while. It’s not true that it can’t be intimate — just the nature of feelings’ expressions is slightly different.
The challenges of rough sex
Rough sex features a lot of aspects, and it can be overwhelming. However, from my experience and after talking to my friends, I understood that we all face similar challenges. If you prepare beforehand, it’s going to be much more comfortable — trust me. Here’s the list of the most overwhelming challenges of rough sex for me.
Preparing the partner
Kinky rough sex ideas are based on chemistry. Both people need to be willing to let loose and be open towards experiencing pain. It takes a certain mindset to enjoy fetish and masochistic activities, and not all people can cultivate that. So, here are some no-gos for rough sex.
- Your partner doesn’t like the idea of being both dominant and submissive. If another person sees himself or herself only in one role, it can be problematic for your sex life. You don’t want to get stuck in a single framework during sex.
- Your partner hates the idea. Sometimes, our loved ones go along with our thoughts instead of voicing their opinions. If the partner doesn’t want to learn how to how to have hardcore sex — perhaps, you need to prepare him or her first.
- Your partner isn’t confident in bed. Then, you need to work on that while gradually increasing the roughness of sex. Nothing drastic — it might make the situation even worth it.
More than any other type of sex, rough sex is built on trust and teamwork. If you don’t feel that in your sexual interactions, you need to communicate better and gradually become freer in bed —but it shouldn’t be rough right away.
All difficulties, described above, can be navigated if you talk them through with your partner. With rough sex, there is a real chance of hurting yourselves in the process, so you need to talk things out.
Discuss what props you will be using, what are the positions and roles, what are the stop signals — it’s essential to let your partner know when to stop. Also, you can agree on trying more lighthearted versions of rough fuck or dive into the depth of it — it depends on your sexual dynamic. A piece of advice: find a rough sex blog that you can trust for additional ideas — you can follow us, for starters.
If you don’t ever try rough positions and sex, you might underestimate the importance of lubrication. You need to prepare your body and mind to have it rough. You need to minimize the friction to avoid penile fractures and vaginal bruises.
For this, be sure to use lube — it can be a bought one or home-made water-based lubes. Also, make sure to use thicker condoms — seek for the Extra types of condoms that are made of more durable materials.
Five best rough sex positions
Now that you know the basic precautions for rough sex, it’s time to learn how to have rough sex. These are my five favorite rough sex techniques, which are the easiest to learn, and I found them to be the most satisfying.
Miss New Booty
Your partner should sit on the bed while you get on his lap and lean to the floor, supporting yourself with hands. The main difficulty here is in being upside down — your head might feel full after intense rough sex, and in required hand strength. You can minimize the load on your hands if your partner holds your booty intensely — which is also sexy.
The position feels like a doggy style — it also combines anal and vaginal penetration and is often foreplay to anal play. The main advantage of the position is that you have high chances of hitting that famous G-spot — a spot in a female’s vagina that leads to the deepest orgasms. The only problem here is with knowing where to stop — if you take it too far, your muscles will get incredibly sore in the morning.
View from the top
It’s a great position for rough sex beginners because it’s not all that painful and violent. It’s like a bridge between vanilla and rough sex — and you can choose in which direction to take it.
You need to sit on your partner’s lap, and he enters you from behind. You don’t have to tense your muscles — which is an advantage, because a lot of rough sex positions feel like a workout. His hands are free, so he can stimulate your nipples or play with your neck. Your hands are free, too — you can scratch or massage your partner. There’s a drawback, too — you won’t get any eye contact, and it deprives rough sex of one of its main kinks.
This is the most known rough sex position. The girl gets on her knees, supporting herself with palms and elbows, whereas a guy enters her from behind. It’s great that the roughness of the position can be managed — you can add BDSM elements, ask your man to rip your hair or spank your booty. Some like doing it in front of the mirror for better sexual stimulation. What’s not so great is the amount of work that we have to pull in for guys to feel great — my legs easily get numb after very intense nights.
If you’d like to start with the tender foreplay, you can ask your man to massage your hips and waist while you two are at it — and then start getting it on roughly.
This one is a variation of a cowgirl position — the girl gets on top, supporting herself with knees, while hands are positioned on man’s chest. The advantage of this position is the girls’ independence: women are responsible for the speed and intensity of the movement — which is great for dominant girls who like to express themselves while having it rough. There is a drawback, too – you have to know in which direction to thrust and regulate the intensity.
Some girls like when their partner is wearing a penis ring — it provides additional stimulation in the vaginal area, and sometimes, it hurts. You can add another element of roughness by scratching your man’s chest or pinching him.
For some girls, riding a man is difficult due to eye contact. You see your partner’s reactions all too well, and it doesn’t always help with confidence. A man enters a girl from behind, as she’s bouncing up and down or right and left on his penis. It’s a combination of a cowgirl and doggy style, only a girl gets to dominate.
On the plus side, it’s easier than cowgirl, because he doesn’t need to see the bottom part of the stomach – which is not the sexiest part of our bodies. On the other hand, there is no way to know if he likes it since you won’t be able to read facial expressions.
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Best rough sex ideas
The best thing about rough sex is that every position can be made rough. You just need to spice it up with ideas for rough sex — and here’s how to do it.
Be dominant and submissive
I can’t emphasize enough on the importance of switching roles, both for you personally and your relationships. You want to get your partner the possibility to see yourself in different lights. Make sure that the partner takes into account what you like — don’t just let him get the pleasure that brings nothing to you. Rough sex is a give-and-take for both — girls and guys shouldn’t make sacrifices.
The main characteristics of rough sex are marks — bites, scratching, and others. Don’t be afraid of digging into your partner’s skin and hold them tightly. Bite your man’s back and neck, and ear lobes — you want to aim for tender areas that are the most sensitive. Don’t overdo it — you need a stop sign, just in case your stimulation becomes unbearable.
Whatever position you are doing, it can be increased tenfold by spanking. You can slap him or give a gentle punch. The best places are thighs and butt — it’s sexy, rough, and dominant. You can do it with your hand, whips, paddles, floggers, and others.
This is one of the best rough sex tips. Pinching isn’t a typical rough sex activity, but it refreshes your sex. You can gad different amounts of skin in various areas, including genitals. It’s very rough, but also creative — because you have a lot of power over your actions impact and pain.
Grab his hair
Your grip should be tight, but don’t apply too much force into the process of pulling itself. You want to hold his hair rather than push it passionately, till he feels no pleasure at all. Be sure to do dirty talk while you are at it. It’s a great opportunity to establish yourself as a dirty dominant partner.
I mean any talk — actual talking, texting, calls, video chats. It’s great if you can change the mediums for dirty talk, keeping it nice and fresh. I also suggest sticking to different themes all the time. You can use something that happened during the day to make the conversation more relevant.
If your partner has a problem with the boss, start something along the lines: “If I were your boss, I would…”. You can get your own rough sex dirty sexting ideas, but you want to shake the style and topics of your dirty talks — so they don’t get redundant.
Sit on his face
It’s a way to dominate your man confidently and dirty. You don’t see his looks, which helps with confidence, but most importantly, it opens the door to oral activities that you wouldn’t e able to explore before to such an extent.
What are the best positions for rough sex?
The most popular one is cowgirl, known as Queenie. Also, a lot of couples like to go doggy-style as their top choice for rough sex because it gives a lot of space for slapping, hair-pulling — hands are free to do anything. If you want to try rough sex regularly, look for positions that allow both you and your partner to be dominant and submissive. Don’t get stuck in a single image; instead, experiment with your attitudes.
Do women like rough sex, and why?
Yes, because it makes us feel stimulated, and our partners look instantly more sexy. This doesn’t mean, of course, that rough sex can substitute gentle positions, fingering, and roleplay. However, it’s a nice way to make sex life much better and let us explore ourselves. Also, we like being dominant, even if we haven’t tried it before, so give us a chance.
What are the rough sex things that you like as a girl?
It’s different for every girl because we like many things. Some love dirty talk. Others enjoy BDSM-elements, whereas others love to humiliate their man while having sex. It’s all about letting it loose and expressing the wildest impulses. Double penetrations leave us very stimulated, especially if they manage to hit that G-Spot.
What do you think about very rough sex?
Very rough sex can be difficult, both physically and mentally. Even couples that know each other well can find it challenging to be roughly taken by their partners. With strangers, very rough sex is usually a no-go — it makes women feel as if they are close to being raped. It can be a different story if there is clear consent from both people, but even then, there is a delicate fine line that is easy to cross with the stranger.
How to prepare before the rough sex?
Two main secrets of rough sex are lubrication and communication. You want to prepare your mind and body for the experience. Discuss which positions you are going to use, who will dominate and who’ll be submissive, and talk about stop signals. Using lubrication is a basic safety measure — you prepare your vagina to rough entries and avoid bruises. Having marks from rough sex is fine, but you’d prefer being able to walk the next morning.
Rough sex video tips from an expert
This video will walk you through challenges, preparation steps, tips, and techniques for an unforgettable rough sex.
Rough sex is enjoyable because you get to know yourself and your partner. All dirty and violent impulses find a way to get out — which, in return, makes your life less stressful and more productive. It can also be beneficial for long-term relationships — partners get to know each other back-to-back, but also, they are always surprised by each other. If you didn’t give a try to rough sex, be sure to do it — at least several times. Great pleasure takes practice, but it’s worth it.