The pick-up lines are known as an ice-breaker, the one that could work well and earn you points or hit an iceberg and drown like Titanic. I’ve made up a list with all possible charming pick-up lines for any occasion to make your crush blush and smile. But let’s go all in and talk about the darkest pick-up lines.
Those nasty ones can be quite rewarding if you use them at the right timing or your future date has a great sense of humor.
Funny but nasty pick-up lines
As I was saying, dirty pick-up lines can be funny as well, and your object of obsession should appreciate those if she has the same twisted sense of humor as you are. Also, anything that is related to good wordplay. Here is what you can use.
- Is your name Summer? Because you’ll be coming soon.
- If it’s true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
- Are you a raisin? Because you’re raisin my dick.
- Tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes.
- Was your dad a baker? Because you’ve got a nice set of buns.
- Do you believe in karma? Because I know some good karma-sutra positions.
- Do you work at Home Depot? Because you’re giving me wood.
- Let me insert my plug into your socket, and we can generate some electricity.
- If I’m a pain in your ass… We can just add more lubricant.
- Fuck me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist,, right?
- Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under.
- You must be Medusa because you make me rock hard.
- Do you go to church often? Because you’re gonna be on your knees tonight.
- Is your name Dora? Because I’ll let you explore this dick.
- I would tell you a joke about my penis, but it’s too long.
- Are you a sea lion? Because I can sea you lion in my bed tonight.
- I’m like Domino’s Pizza. If I don’t come in 30 minutes, the next one is free.
- I want to use your thighs as earmuffs.
- This may seem corny, but you make me really horny.
- I’m no weatherman, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.
- Girl, are you an iceberg? Because you’re making me want to go down.
- I’ll kiss you in the rain, so you get twice as wet.
- My magical watch says you’re not wearing any panties? Oh, you are? Darn, it must be an hour fast.
- Are you related to Dracula? Because you looked a little thirsty when you were looking at me.
- Treat me like a pirate and give me that booty.
- I like my coffee how I like my woman… creamed.
- My doctor told me I have a Vitamin D deficiency. Wanna go back to my place and save me?
- I’m a zombie, can I eat you out?
- Your body is made up of 70% water… and I’m thirsty.
- Is it hot in here? Or is it just you?
- Roses are red. Violets are fine. You’ll be the 6. I’ll be the 9.
- Let’s play Titanic. You’ll be the iceberg, and I’ll go down.
- Hold on, you’ve got something on your ass… my eyes.
- Let’s play Winnie the Pooh and get my nose stuck in your honey jar.
- I would tell you a joke about my penis, but it’s too long!
- Brrr! My hands are cold. Can I keep them between your boobs to make them warm?
Little cheesy but dirty pick-up lines
Some would still say these pick-up lines cheesy, but we would say these are on edge between being dirty and a little bit cheesy.
- Can you do telekinesis? Because you’ve made a part of my move without even touching it.
- Are you a drill sergeant? Because you have my privates standing at attention.
- Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore — my face should be among them.
- Your smile is almost as big, warm, and lovely as my penis.
- Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
- I’d love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. And the ones on your face.
- Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit.
- Are you an archaeologist? Because I’ve got a bone for you to examine.
- Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie. I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle.
- Are you a cowgirl? Because I can see you riding me.
- Do you mix concrete for a living? Because you’re making me hard.
- Do you know what I like in a girl? My dick.
- I have a big headache. I hear the best cure for headaches is sex. What do you say we go upstairs and work out a remedy?
- What’s the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I don’t have a Ferrari.
- Why don’t you surprise your roommate and not come home tonight?
- Are you my homework? Cause I’m not doing you, but I definitely should be.
- Are you butt dialing? Because I swear that ass is calling me.
- I want to wear you like a pair of sunglasses… One leg over each ear.
- Let’s play house. You can be the door then I can slam you all I want.
- You know, if I were you, I’d have sex with me.
- I bet your nipples are pink. Mind if I take a look?
- Bet I can touch your belly button… from the inside.
- You look so good, I wanna kiss your lips and move up to your belly button.
- Some men go around telling women they have an eight-inch penis, but I’d never shortchanged myself like that.
- I think my allergies are acting up. Because every time you’re around, my dick swells up.
- I’ve just received government funding for a four-hour expedition to find your G-spot.
- Do you know why they call me the cat whisperer? Because I know exactly what your pussy needs.
- I’m having trouble sleeping by myself, can you sleep with me?
- Need a pillow to sit on? I can be yours if you want.
- Damn, that ass is bigger than my future.
- Call me ‘fireman’…. because girl, you are on fire and I am here to save you.
- Baby, you are too sexy for me to resist.
- Looking forward to having you later.
- What is your favorite part of the day to have sex? Can I come and visit you somewhere around that time?
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Dirty pick-up lines to say to a guy and make him wonder
Females are powerful, so allow yourself to be bold for once, trust me, you would love it, and leave him speechless with one of these lines.
- I’m not into watching sunsets, but I’d love to see you go down.
- I don’t think I want your babies, but I wouldn’t mind refining my baby-making technique with you.
- Did you just come out of the oven? Because you’re hot.
- You are so selfish. You’re going to have that body the rest of your life, and I just want it for one night.
- Are you a trampoline? Because I want to bounce on you.
- As long as you have a face, I’ll have a place to sit.
- Why pay for a bra when I would gladly let you hold my boobs up all day?
- The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor.
- If I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting a head?
- Don’t ever change. Just get naked.
- I can see into the future, and yeah, we’re gonna fuck at least once.
- Smile if you want to have sex with me.
- I wish you were soap so I could feel you all over me.
- If you were an elevator, what button would I have to push to get you to go down?
- I’ll show you my tan lines if you show me yours.
- I’m scared of getting pregnant, so do you want to go up to my room and help me test all my condoms?
- I hope you’re a plumber because you’ve got my pipe leaking.
- I can sense that liquor is not the only hard thing around here.
- You’re on my list of things to do tonight.
- Your clothes are making me uncomfortable; please take them off.
- Let’s play a game. The fastest person to take their clothes off wins.
- I’m a mind reader, and yes, I will sleep with you.
- Let’s go to my place and do the things I’ll tell everyone we did anyway.
- You’re just like a wine tasting. They say to spit, but I always prefer swallowing.
- I was feeling off today, but you definitely turned me on.
- Are you a sprinkler? Because you’re making me wet.
- I love my bed, but I’d rather be in yours.
- Are you undressing me with your eyes?!
- With school, I just want an A. With you, I just want to F.
- That’s a nice shirt. Can I try it on after we have sex?
- Is that a candy cane in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
- Want to come over and watch porn all night on my new mirror?
- I know three ways to make six inches disappear.
- The only thing I was creative with today was my dirty thoughts… Guess who inspired them all?
- I am at work, but I would rather be in bed with you. Right now.
- I just wanted to tell you that my new underwear looks really amazing and sexy on my skin. If you don’t believe me, I think you should see it for yourself.
- It makes me feel amazingly turned on when I just think about you touching me down there.
- I have to be honest; whenever I see you, my knees weaken, my heart skips a beat, and I want to pull you close and do all sorts of dirty and sweet things to you.
- How often do you think about me when you masturbate?
- What turns you on the most? Why me? Why so much?
- What is the kinkiest fantasy you have about me, and do you want to make it happen?
- Would you like me to go commando?
- Would you mind sending me a sexy picture of yourself?
- Leather or lace?
Nasty pick-up lines for girls who can play dirty
Set the mood right away and let her know what your business is about. There is a chance it all could fail, but it also can turn out to be damn rewarding. Take your chance.
- Do you like to draw? Because I put the D in Raw.
- Want to see if you can add “has an awesome gag reflex” to your resume?
- Let’s play carpenter. First, we’ll get hammered, then I’ll nail you.
- Are you a pirate? Because I have a lot of semen waiting for you.
- When I saw you, I lost my tongue. Can I put yours in my mouth?
- Is that a keg in your pants? Because I’d love to tap that ass.
- What has four legs and doesn’t have the most beautiful girl on it? My bed. Want to fix that?
- I’m gonna have sex with you tonight so you might as well be there.
- Roses or daisies? Now I know what flowers to put on your casket when I murder that pussy.
- Are you a flappy bird? Because I could tap you all night.
- I may not go down in history, but I’ll go down on you.
- Remember my name, because you’ll be screaming it later.
- Are your legs made of Nutella? Because I’d love to spread them.
- My dick just died. Would you mind if I buried it in your ass?
- Let me guess your favorite position: anything that involves my balls bouncing against your ass.
- My couch pulls out, but I don’t.
- Great dress. I’m sorry I’ll have to rip it apart.
- If I was your teacher, I’d give you the D.
- Sit on my face, and I’ll eat my way to your heart.
- I was looking at sex toys today, and I found a few I would love to use on you.
- Do you like jalapeños? Because in no time I’ll be jalapeño pussy.
- Do you like it loud? If yes, I can make you scream and beg for more.
Inappropriate pick-up lines that might get you in trouble
Do I need to add anything else? Besides, those will be the weirdest words that come out from your mouth, and it also might be not that flattering to you personally. Those are inappropriate as hell, but why not, you live only once.
- I could’ve called heaven and asked for an angel, but I was hoping you’re a slut instead.
- Are you a shark? Because I’ve got some swimmers for you to swallow.
- Do you have a shovel? Because I’m digging that ass.
- I hope you like dragons because I’ll be dragon my balls across your face tonight.
- Are you my new boss? Because you just gave me a raise.
- Hi, I’m wasted, but this condom in my pocket doesn’t have to be.
- Are you the lottery lady on TV? Because I’m picturing you holding up my balls.
- Do you need a stud in your life? Cause I got the STD, and all I need is U.
- Are you a racehorse? Because when I ride, you’ll always finish first.
- Did you grow up on a chicken farm? Because you sure know how to raise a cock.
- Are you a tortilla? Because I want to flip you over and eat you out.
- You can call me a cake because I’ll go straight to your ass.
- Call me leaves, because you should be blowing me.
- I just popped a Viagra. So we’ve got about 30 minutes to get back to your place.
- Hey, you wanna do a 68? You go down on me, and I’ll owe you one.
- You should sell hotdogs because you already know how to make a wiener stand.
- There will only be 7 planets left after I destroy Uranus.
- I spent over a grand on Viagra today, only to come here and see you and find out that I don’t need it after all.
- My dick’s been feeling a little dead lately. Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth?
- I wanna floss with your pubic hair.
- Do you have pet insurance? Because your pussy’s getting smashed tonight.
- Excuse me, I am about to masturbate and needed a name to go with the face.
- I’m an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus.
- Can you tell me what time your legs open, please?
- I may not have gotten your virginity, but can I at least have the box it came in?
- Does your pussy smell like fish? Because I like sushi.
- Do you like kids? ‘Cause I’m about to make your mouth a daycare.
- Excuse me, but do you give head to strangers? (Answer: No) Well then, allow me to introduce myself.
- You don’t like to have sex while you are on your period? That’s OK, but I just want you to know that I don’t mind a little ketchup on the hot dog as long as the bun is tight.
Best dirty pick-up lines for dating apps
Not the way to approach your match if he or she has “looking for a serious relationship, no hookups” in bio — you would piss them off. On the other hand, if the person is DTF, these pick-up lines will make you golden.
- One of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you wanna help me prove him wrong?
- Do you want to commit a sin for your next confessional?
- The FBI wants to steal my penis. Can I hide it inside you?
- I can tell you’re into yoga, why don’t you spend a little time showing me just how flexible you are?
- I’m a bird watcher, and I’m looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher. Have you seen one?
- I lost my keys… Can I check your pants?
- Do you like whales? Because we can go hump back at my place.
- Do you know your ABC’s? Cause I wanna give you the 4th letter of the alphabet.
- Are you a farmer? Because you’ve got some big, round, beautiful melons.
- That’s a beautiful smile, but it’d look even better if it was all you were wearing.
- What is a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
- Pizza is my second favorite thing to eat in bed.
- Your place or mine? Tell you what? I’ll flip a coin. Head at my place, tail at yours.
- If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
- Let us let only latex stand between our love.
- There is plenty of fish in the sea, but you’re the only one I’d like to catch and mount back at my place.
- Are those jeans Guess? Because guess who wants to be inside them…
- You’re so hot even my zipper is falling for you.
- If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
- What time do you get off? Can I watch?
- So you’re not into casual sex? Fine, I’ll put on a tux, and we can call it formal sex.
- Excuse me, but does my tongue taste funny to you?
- Want to save water by showering together?
- I’m like a Rubik’s Cube, the more you play with me, the harder I get.
- I know a great way to burn off the calories in that drink.
- Are you a supermarket sample? Because I wanna taste you again and again without any sense of shame.
- They say that kissing is a language of love, so would you mind starting a conversation with me?
- I’m on top of things. Would you like to be one of them?
- Are you an exam? Because I have been studying you like crazy.
- You dropped something. My jaw.
- If I were the judge, I’d sentence you to my bed.
- Aside from being extremely sexy, what else do you do for a living?
- You must be my Tinderella because I’m going to make that dress disappear at midnight.
- Have you ever tried bondage?
When is it best to use pick-up lines?
You can insert your pick-up line anywhere in a conversation. Usually, it is the first thing you say to a stranger to break the ice. But you can use them when it feels appropriate.
Can I use multiple pick-up lines?
Yes, you can use as many pick-up lines as you want as long as that gets you to the result that you want to get.
How to choose a pick-up line to go with on a dating app?
There are a few notes to consider. Read the bio of the person you are about to send a message. That could lead you in the right direction and get the attention right away. If there is no bio and pic doesn’t say much to you either, then go with the one from the list that stands out to you the most.